Former swinging trucker, Becky Crews (still swinging, on swing),

feigns innocence of off-road "reputation" to Kay McClanahan, who ain't buying.

Dorothy McClanahan, Guest of Honor, gloats over doubling retirement fund

by cleaning everybody's clock at Texas Hold 'Em.

(No, she wasn't a classmate. She just LOOKS like one! She's Kay McClanahan's Mom.)

Judge Fred Davis drowns sorrows after Lee Carter asks Sondra Hercher Gordy to dance FIRST.

Linda Lewis offers fashion tips to David Levi. Goes over like lead balloon.

Tireless romantic Ramona Green makes pass at Dick Dewoody, who can't recall how to respond.

Forced to share bedroom with only a sheet between them, Susan Zook and Bob Glasscock secretly watch each other undress for nighty-night.

Poignant, since neither has seen opposite sex naked in decades.

Billy Roberts, Johnny Green, Clair Norman celebrate graduation

 from Betty Ford Clinic. Re- rehab stares them in face.

(BTW, Johnny, we don't care what your plastic surgeon said:

finger-amputation does not make you look younger.)

Johnny Green, Gary, Billy Roberts, Bill Nuckolls attempt to look cool during bewildering "Donna Summer Disco Retrospective." Cynthia and Tommy Stone only straight couple on deck.

Plaid shirts? Disco no-no.

Skipper Ronnie Jones (only one sober) pilots Judge Fred Davis, Mara Levi, Bob Glasscock, Ronnie's guest, Debbie Hayes,

and Johnny Green around scenic Lake Hamilton on party barge.

In reverse.

Vixen Ramona Green (with fan) attempts seduction of conservative banker, Tommy Barton, whose body language says Simmons First.

Peggy Tinsley, Mara Levi, Debbie Mitchell, Robin Barton kick serious butt with white-girl impression of Shirelles' "Baby, It's You."

Peggy and Sam Tinsley embarrass selves with exotic Aztec foreplay ritual, as Butch Mitchell tags Peggy to discreetly suggest couple, "Get a room."

Bob Glasscock, Debbie Mitchell perform lewd pole dancing demo.

Nobody cares.

(Pole, however, thrilled with attention.)

Becky Crews snaps portrait of husband, Weldon, making move on Kay McClanahan. Crews later claims he thought "bi-lingual" meant something else.

Sam and Peggy Tinsley spellbound by Mara Levi's tales of boosting business at "Mara's Homemade" in New York by cooking in nude.

Lee Carter converses in American Sign Language with oblivious geranium.

Lee Carter, Gary Moore, bond. Sweet.

Gary Moore, Billy Roberts, studiously avoid Butch Mitchell's attempt to initiate macho snot-blowing competition.

Clair Norman, Dr. Bill and Ellen Nuckolls, Bill Allen do best to ignore Billy Roberts' salacious remark regarding Clair's anatomy.

Bob "What Bald Spot?" Glasscock regales Peggy Tinsley, Robin Barton, Clair Norman, Kay McClanahan with hilarious joke involving door-to-door salesman and goat, forgetting he told them same joke previous year.

Dick Dewoody, Weldon Crews, (Sancho Panza

and Don Quixote in "Man of La Mancha,") render

"The Impossible Dream" whilst starving guests wait for charcoal to light and neighbors phone law enforcement.

Lee Carter reacts to Judge Fred Davis' next-day

insistence that he asked Sondra Hercher Gordy to

dance first.

Fikes, Davis and Wayne Matthews discuss SI Swimsuit Issue.

Tommy Barton fails to get word in edgewise.

Jim Patterson, cameraless for once, allows own photograph to be

taken. He's the photographer extraordinaire who shot

most of the pix here!

Becky Roberts gives Judge Fred Davis biggest thrill he's had in six years.

Billy Roberts eyes wife giving Judge thrill.

Craig McClain Screws Wine Bottle!

First, Clair McClain Norman's underage brother shouldn't have been there.
Too young.

He's 58.

Second, Lee and Cathy Carter display perhaps unnerving affection
for both McClains.

Third, only Johnny Green appears to take whole scenario seriously.
Or else he's hammered.

Caption at own risk.